To graft is defined as: to unite or join by insertion or by placing in close contact. Its a term I had heard used before and I knew the definition of but it wasn't until recently that the meaning actually connected to my reality. I have heard the term "grafted in" being used in reference to adoption more frequently than anywhere else. Even still, it wasn't until I read about the agricultural process in a book called, "A Place of Healing" by Joni Eareckson Tada that it resonated with me. Now I KNOW what grafting is and how it feels to be part of such a process.
Here is an excerpt from the book:
"Early Spring is grafting time. Uncle Don would select his trees, find just the right place on the bark, peel it away, and make a slanting cut into the heart of the wood. He would then take a small branch, whittle its end, then push the graft into the damp center of the tree, covering the union to keep it cool and moist. Later that spring, new life would emerge: blossoms to buds then buds to beautiful fruit. But it didn't happen without a wounding in both the tree and branch."
Similarly John Bunyan once wrote:
"Where there is grafting there is cutting, the scion must be let in with a wound; to stick it onto the outside or tie it on with a string would be of no use. Heart must be set to heart and back to back, or there will be no sap from root to branch, and this I say, must be done by a wound."This adoption life is a wounding work. Daily I am wounded at the heart of my selfishness and desire for an easier path to the heart of my daughter. Whether I like it or not it has to be heart to heart and back to back despite so much doubt and fear, heartache and tears. It has definitely not been a smooth, easy-going process- and to this day, it isn't. Somehow, the result of all this cutting and wounding, grafting and healing will be fruit beyond what she or I could have ever produced on our own. For there is no saving work apart from pain and my ultimate desire is to see both branch and tree be fruitful. So may the grafting continue...